The Magic Bullet

The History Chanel recently aired "JFK: Three Shots that Changed America," a three-hour documentary on the assassination of America's 35th president.

How the times have changed, irrevocably, inconceivably. No doubt shows like "Mad Men" capture glimpses of the sixties, but these are glossy, orchestrated, and romanticized. Things that seemed bromide are now security risks - JFK mulling about in crowds, though nerve-racking for the SS, was practiced. Imagine Obama doing the same - those forty years have seen some of the most drastic changes of all.

On that day, Jackie O. was wearing "some knobby pink thing" as a CBS reporter observed. The people in Fort Worth were there to see her style, and to shake hands with the President. They wanted a smile, a "how are you?" from the president, and only that.

The Media and, by proxy, news and entertainment outlets, have proven fascinating litmus tests of history. How the news saw the Kennedy Assassination the day of it divulges from how it was seen a week later - and, of course, with forty some odd years of analysis and insight, how will Matthew Weiner and Co. color the assassination? How different a world it is, from November 22, 1963, to the upcoming November 22, 2009, where, when President Obama came to New York City with the First Lady to see a show in May, the closest the press could get was half a block away, carefully watched by the NYPD and rooftop snipers.

These are tumultuous times, times of metal detectors and bomb-sniffing dogs and tracers. Yet, with things as they are, it is all too easy to forget that the so-called Golden Years of America were still riddled with danger - presidents were still assassinated a century and a half ago; America has been, mostly, a dangerous country. There were few sanctions in the developing West, where vigilantes and rogues took the law into their own hands. And yet, the 1950's and, to an extent, the 1960's, were the halcyon days, to be looked upon longingly.

Those days were fugacious at best, a hyperbolic lie at worst.

What of the Bay of Pigs, the Cuban Missile Crisis? How easy it is to get caught up in the worries most germane to us - crumbling economies, swine flu, Lady Gaga - but how important it is to turn back the pages of history, to be reminded of the echoes of the past.

Networks, Expounded

Stations have always (and I use this term lightly, since always implicates infinite existence) been giving themselves aesthetic face lifts. Things to make them pretty. Shiny, even. But what's in a network? What is the signature thing that makes someone say, "Oh, that's an ABC show, right?" Just what I was wondering. Let's investigate, shall we?


ABC
American Broadcasting Company.

Known Best For: Endearing dramadies, heart-warming home renovations, crazy islands outside of the space-time continuum, wipe-outs
Famous Faces: Meredith Grey's whiny self-indulgent mug ("Grey's Anatomy"), Ty Pennington ("Extreme Makeover: Home Edition," Sears commercials), Scared and/or nervous people from "LOST," Mickey Mouse.
Catchphrase: "Start Here."
Underrated Show: "Pushing Daisies." No matter what Entertainment Weekly pundits have to say about it.
Shiny Factor: Invented

NBC
National Broadcasting Company

Known Best For: Deadpan comedies, Laws and Orders, The Olympics, More Reality TV, Conan.
Famous Faces: Michael Scott (Steve Carell of "The Office"), Ann Curry, Liz Lemon/Tina Fey ("30 Rock").
Catchphrase: "Must See TV."
Underrated Show: "Chuck." It's cute and cuddly and nerdy and is available on a Friday night. What more do you want?
Shiny Factor: Flashy as a peacock.



CBS
Columbia Broadcasting System
Known Best For: Demeaning Reality Television, Moderately Good Sitcoms, A Lot of Crime Shows
Famous Faces: The sad little children exploited for "Kid Nation"
Most Underrated Show: "Jericho," and also: "Twin Peaks."
Catchphrase: Let's See Who Next to Exploit.